Fooling Around with the Fellas (V1, E1)
- Kat
- Dec 20, 2017
- 6 min read
Wassup "Clowder Gang"! So, some fellas took a break and talked with me about relationships, friends with benefits, cheating, and more.
I always like to get guys input on certain things because, let's face it ladies, some guys are really messed up in the head and the way they think is horrible.
*Guys are anonymous and some language may have been changed due to explicit content*
I interviewed 5 guys:
> Male 1: 21, Richmond, VA
> Male 2: 22 , Brooklyn, NY
> Male 3: 26, Newark, NJ
> Male 4: 19, Richmond, VA
> Male 5: 30, Trinidad and Tobago
1. Are you currently involved with someone?
> Male 1: "Nope"
> Male 2: "Nah"
> Male 3: "No I'm not"
> Male 4: "Yes"
> Male 5: "No, I am not"
2. What is your definition of friends with benefits?
> Male 1: "I guess just looking like friends in public, but you [having sex] when y'all alone. And one/both of y'all got a reason why y'all ain't together."
> Male 2: "A friend in which you benefit from.. In whatever needs are needed at the time, i guess. Mainly a friend that you could f*** when you need some."
> Male 3:"Man or female that you are friends with for a beneficial reason."
> Male 4: "Having all the intimate relations, but no strings or titles attached."
>Male 5: "When that 'friendship,' crosses into the 'relationship' area, but both parties don't want to define it as such."
3. Would you mind having a friend with benefits?
> Male 1: "No, I wouldn't mind. It just can't happen a lot... Cause that's when it gets tricky. You get tangled up in what's supposed to be no strings attached."
> Male 2: "Yes and no cause deada** everything in life is like, complicated."
> Male 3: "Anyone that says they wouldn't would be lying. Cause everyone needs a beneficial push in life."
> Male 4: "Not at all."
> Male 5: "Not my thing, prefer a relationship."
4. Do you prefer a friend with benefits or a relationship?
> Male 1: "I guess a relationship. Well, I'm kinda in the middle. Cause in the middle there's no real commitment like the 'dating' stage... Like y'all both know wassup.
> Male 2: "I prefer both energy wise."
> Male 3: "Either... If I really had to think, [it would be] benefits."
> Male 4: "Honestly, it depends on which situation approaches me first, the female of course, and how I feel about the person."
>Male 5: "Relationship, because we just continue to build on our friendship and actually get to create something potentially epic."
5. Do you believe in dating multiple people at the same time?
> Male 1: "Oh nah... That's too much to do; too much to learn."
> Male 2: "Hell no... But, at the same time I understand people have others attention through many reasons. I don't agree with it, but I understand why it happens"
> Male 3: "Yes, I do, if I'm not in a relationship."
> Male 4: "No ma'am... Because, that's called cheating. I wouldn't want to get cheated on if I'm pouring my heart out to you on a daily basis, so I wouldn't do it to you."
> Male 5: "Negatory, 1 is enough for me."
6. Would you consider dating multiple people at the same time, a hoe?
> Male 1: "Yes, cause you doing too much."
> Male 2: "No, I believe not being loyal and dishonesty makes you a hoe."
> Male 3: "No, a hoe is getting paid for sexual services. Dating multiple people is a free soul."
> Male 4: "No, because I'm not in any position to place a title over someone's way of doing things just because I may not agree with how they handle their relationship(s)."
> Male 5: "No, just that person's preference. That's a lying a** mofo [if they aren't up front with it]."
7. Do you see yourself getting married? If yes, what age? If no, why not?
> Male 1: "Yeah not for a while though. Like 30s. That's when I'll really be out looking for somebody. But, now they just come and go. As long as I have a kid before that, I'll be okay."
> Male 2: "Yeah, maybe 27 or 28. "
> Male 3: "No, I don't. If I find the right one, okay, yeah. Til then, no. I don't know if there is a right one. They can be [the right one], but who knows if I'm the right one for her."
> Male 4: "Hopefully yes, and to be honest I don't know. Is it weird to say that I don't feel a certain age?"
> Male 5: "I do. [But I] can't call it really, just know it when I feel its right.
8. What is your ideal girlfriend?
> Male 1: "A girl that is funny, has there head on straight, and has motherly qualities."
> Male 2: "Smart, loyal, and if she could cook rice she good in my book. Lastly, honest."
> Male 3: "Pretty, smart, and remind me of my mother."
> Male 4: "My girlfriend."
> Male 5: "Wow, that's a good question. Intelligent, funny, compassionate, doesn't take herself too serious, driven, beautiful personality internally and externally."
9. Since you're single, is there a reason why you're not with anyone?
> Male 1: "Me and this girl were real close, but we had too much in common so it was just boring so I stopped talking to her... I'm tryna give this one girl all this *inserts vegetable/inappropriate emoji*"
> Male 2: "I'm not ready for a relationship, but at the same time, can always use the company."
> Male 3: "Cause my lady was my best friend for 10 years, then became my lady for 2 years. Came to prison, left me 7-8 months later. I talk to females now, just feel like A Boogie wit da Hoodie, DTB interlude."
> Male 4: N/A
> Male 5: "Last relationship ended in the summer and haven't came across anyone who I would be interested in getting into one with until recently."
10. What is worse, getting cheated on or getting cheated with and not knowing?
> Male 1: "Cheated on, cause if you get cheated on it sucks and at least for me, I never really saw it coming and cheating with ain't really your fault if you didn't know.."
> Male 2: "Cheating is cheating and it's all bad I believe personally. Cheating is bad, period!"
> Male 3: "Cheating regardless is bad. Now, if there's a beneficial reason behind it for both of y'all then that's the only good reason."
> Male 4: "I don't think either is worse than the other, because they are both f****d up."
> Male 5: "Knowledge hurts even more."
11. Would you stay with your girlfriend if they cheated on you? Why or why not?
> Male 1: "It depends on what's going on. If she had sex with someone else? Oh, let the door hit yah where the good Lord split yah. Flirting sober? She getting the jazzy Jeff.It depends if she tells me, too. If she tells me, it's not okay, but I wouldn't break up with her. It would just be something to keep in mind.
> Male 2: "Hell no. You broke loyalty, like s**t, I wouldn't do it even if tempted. So the other person isn't allowed to do it either. Like, I don't know maybe I'm not hip to this new s**t where motherf****** is cheating and s**t like nah, I'm not with that. That's mad extra work, but if I'm single it's a different story, I'm bussin s**t down."
> Male 3: "No, I wouldn't. If my girl cheats on me, she was never mine, just temporary. And her temp tag is expired."
> Male 4: "No, but it would be really hard to walk away from that situation. Reason being because if I genuinely care about you to the point where I'd get hurt because you did something like that to me, then I can't just say 'f**k the feelings I have for you, I'm done!' I'd take the extras into consideration while choosing how to move forward with myself whether it be with your or without you."
> Male 5: "No, I know myself. [I] would just see them as a huge liar. Can't do that to myself."
Fellas, do y'all agree with their answers? Ladies, do y'all like what you see? Comment your opinion on what they had to say!
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